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Sunday 10 August 2014

The secret filthy life of a smut writer.



I don’t often share too much of my private life – I prefer to keep it separate to my smutty persona but the irony of this is not lost on me.

When you think of someone sitting down to their computer to write erotica you don’t ever think it might actually be the cleanest part of their day but let me tell you, all too often it is J
But the filth I’m talking about is not smut, oh no!
I’m talking muck, dirty brown earth mixed with rain water so that when you walk in it, you’re up to your ankles in mud. So job number one of the day is often pull the wellington boots on. Then it's off out to the woodshed… no don’t get too excited... it’s not for secret spankings hidden from the children – it’s to feed the feathered children – the hens and chickens. 
The first thing that hits you is the noise as they demand their freedom and food, then the smell. So I trudge across the ground, covered in that smelly excrement that they will drop everywhere, and I mean everywhere, tiptoeing through the few spots they have not pooed on.
Next on the agenda is the pony. Mr Pony is even more mucky than Mr and all the Mrs and little Masters and Misses Chickens. His poop is so much bigger….Pick my way through, feed him try not to get stuck in any mucky holes that he has stamped into the soggy soil. Fail. Get wedged, land on my arse in mud, pick myself up, feed and water Mr Pony who I swear to God is laughing at me. Then the dogs run in around me as I try to get up, knocking me down into the dirt again in their enthusiasm.

Finally the day's dirt is done, I can shower, get clean and sit down and get dirty all over again, writing the filthiest sex I can imagine, while I stay nice and clean!!! J


Have a great day.

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